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lyrics

Breathing in, then out, that’s how it all starts. The day, the life, the test, the speech. The difficult things you have to say. It supplies oxygen to the alveoli, the blood, the little cells in the brain that get bathed in the fluid. It helps them get through too.

Have you ever sat there staring out of the window, wondering if you could jump through it, break out, run away? Little trees in the distance growing bigger, then their leafy arms enfold you and you are out the other side, the void of the field and sky, the smile broadening on your face, the phone ringing into a ditch with a splish!

Turning around, still staggering backwards, you look at what you are leaving behind. Look, there’s the roof of Tesco. The roar of the motorway. The termite-like structures built in the sixties, little people scurrying around to nowhere. The bookies – that horrible pub – the street – a car splashes them – their house. Same as all the others.

Turn away, leave those streets you’ve walked so many times before. I remember the times I used to walk around the industrial estate, face hidden within the Gore-Tex hood, rain splashing down and trickling from its rim, occasional sips of Red Bull to power the visons in my head – Sarah, and me, married. Sarah, and me, holding hands, Sarah, and me, in love. Sarah, there, when I got in. from the cold. But no, she would not be there, so I went around the block another time, listened to Radiohead’s “Street Spirit” again.

Rows of houses / Are bearing down on me / I can feel their / Blue hands touching me

So I’ll miss it. A bit. But what I can’t stand is it missing me. All the people in there – some of them know me and some of them like me. How can I cut myself away from them? Well, this is what I need to do today. By the end of the day today, I want there to be not one person who will want me here. Only then will I feel like all the thin wires an threads that bind me to others have been severed, and I will be free, like the balloons you sometimes see rising rapidly, waving their string erratically and dancing into the stratosphere.

credits

from Righteous Maelstrom, released May 10, 2015

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Jazz Trance London, UK

Jazz Trance were formed in 2004 in New Cross by Mel Gough and Simon Cleary at Goldsmiths College over a shared love of Throbbing Gristle and other intense sounds.

Their work is fully improvised - trusted to the moment.

Over the years their chaotic and confrontational live presence and recorded material has become more at peace with itself, slowly discovering the sweetness behind the strong. ... more

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